I'm short on time lately - work is killing me, I am trying to get all my schizer together to get back in school and, well, I like to drink wine on the weekends with this guy...so sorry to be negligient!
*This is a real conversation I had recently* I am not proud...and no, I don't remember how it started.
Ranger: Would you give someone your panties after sex?
Me: No way - it's a trophy, and personally I consider that demeaning.
LWITW: I would never!
Ranger: Why not?
LWITW: Because my DNA is on them. Someone could rob a 7-11 and frame me!
Ranger: You think someone will rob a 7-11 with your dirty panties?
LWITW: Yes! And then I'll go to jail. I saw it on CSI.
Me: I've got nothing.
Happy Friday :)
Friday, March 27, 2009
Sunday, March 1, 2009
DC handles snow as well as I handle tequila
So we are on the verge of a major winter weather event. This morning I grabbed my coffee, my bagel and my newspaper and headed to the basement to watch some news and do my mandatory Sunday morning lazy time. Every local news station had hit their panic button. A few regular new stories followed by - at ten minute intervals - the weatherman appearing and talking about the 6-8 inches we are getting. One news anchor said it's time to stock up on milk and bread. Because yes, people, with 6-8 inches of snow you will be buried in your home for weeks! Weeks! Maybe even a month.
Ok, I know 6-8 inches is a good amount of snow. But I'm from Chicago - 6-8 inches will probably get you a snow day, but it's certainly not the end of the world. My husband is from the Boston area. When it snows 6-8 inches they call it 'spring'. I guess I'm just not a fair judge of winter weather. So I called my BFF in Atlanta, who had just gotten some snow from this storm. I asked her if she was doing okay and she thought that maybe I was drunk or thought I was talking to someone else. She said it wasn't bad - and she was still alive - and no awful things like suffering from spontaneous diarrhea had happened as result of the weather.
On to the tequila. When I was younger and dumber I loved doing shots of tequila. It inevitably ended with me making out with strangers, jumping in the back of some random guy's pick up truck to go to a 4 am bar, or running away from 'that crazy guy calling my name' who happened to be my dad. Good times. Yes, I know my parents must be proud of me.
So, DC rest assured, you are not the only one who can't hang.
Ok, I know 6-8 inches is a good amount of snow. But I'm from Chicago - 6-8 inches will probably get you a snow day, but it's certainly not the end of the world. My husband is from the Boston area. When it snows 6-8 inches they call it 'spring'. I guess I'm just not a fair judge of winter weather. So I called my BFF in Atlanta, who had just gotten some snow from this storm. I asked her if she was doing okay and she thought that maybe I was drunk or thought I was talking to someone else. She said it wasn't bad - and she was still alive - and no awful things like suffering from spontaneous diarrhea had happened as result of the weather.
On to the tequila. When I was younger and dumber I loved doing shots of tequila. It inevitably ended with me making out with strangers, jumping in the back of some random guy's pick up truck to go to a 4 am bar, or running away from 'that crazy guy calling my name' who happened to be my dad. Good times. Yes, I know my parents must be proud of me.
So, DC rest assured, you are not the only one who can't hang.
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