Nicknames

When I'm on the metro, I've taken to nicknaming people I see often on my daily commute. I imagine most people do this, and if they were to nickname me it's either orange backpack or doghair coat lady. Those lint rollers I bought at Ikea really suck. But I digress.

There's the guy who always has a ton of stuff. He has a huge briefcase with papers and files sticking out of it, his coffee, his full edition of the newspaper, and his lunch. I call him everything but the kitchen sink man. He runs up to the train and cuts in front of me to get a good seat...when it's usually pretty empty at 6 am at my station anyway. Whatever kitchen sink. You do your thing if it makes you feel better.

There's the woman who is super slow on the escalators and wears skirt suits with nylons and white socks and sneakers. Now, if you actually wear sneakers for comfort wouldn't you think you'd be able to move just a bit faster than me in my heels? She goes by molasses in my mind.

And then there's the guy who is about 5'4, wears huge glasses, and has a backpack the size of himself. I like to call him moleman. Moleman actually seems like a very nice guy, he always has a smile on his face and I feel guilty for nicknaming him...but I can't help it, I'm an awful person.

These are three of my favorites. I wonder if anyone has better nicknames out there?